Chai and shiny rocks

I have decided that chai makes everything better. I don;t think it will ever replace coffee but I am willing to make a morning spot for chai too. that and it is close to Chani, the name of frank herbert's heroine in Dune. and she was wonderful! one of my favorite fictional characters, better than Paul even.

I had a very emotional weekend.... I don't do emotional well or gracefully. I misread a situation and rather than communicate about it, made some huge assumptions that were wrong, and hurt my own feelings. I feel horrible about how I acted, and reacted. I did learn that communication makes relationships less messy. but it still stung. I know that without trust there cannot be love. I try not to have expectations about my relationships, expectations mess things up, but I have them and they make my world more stable. I have to say I was relieved when the explanation was innocent, and my feathers were smoothed. I never thought I would be jealous like that in my entire life. In the past I walked in on a woman with a man I was seeing, but in that situation I had absolutely no expectations from him. yes I was angry, but I knew I honestly didn't have anything invested in the relationship. Maybe that is why it hurt, I feel like I had given my trust and it had been shit on. Being a person who has actually fallen in shit, the falling in shit wasn't as bad as that.

Ok the shiny part.... its not the shiny part that impresses women its the fact that you want to express your self in a way that makes a fuss over her. YOU SHOULD WANT TO MAKE THE FUSS. that is what valentines day is about, that is what fancy rings and romantic interludes and flowers are about. women want to feel like we are important enough to put down the book, make the trip, buy the card, "blow" the money. If you are making someone feel like a goddess how can that be viewed as blowing? It doesn;t have to be huge and over the top, but a little recognition and effort make us feel special.
ok rants done